This Day in Death

2.10.13: Lolong, the World’s Largest Saltwater Crocodile – DEAD!

Filed under: Dead —James @ 8:05 am February 12, 2013

LOLONGAt what point can we just call it a fucking dinosaur? Nobody wants anything to be cool anymore.

If you’re still dragging your feet about booking that vacation to the Philippine town of Bunawan then I’ve got two pieces of bad news for you: 1.) You have awful vacation ideas, and 2.) you might as well not even bother anymore because Lolong, the 20-foot long crocodile that’s lived there for decades, is dead. With Lolong gone, Bunawan is expected to fall back on its next most popular tourist attractions; creepy Jesus paintings and contracting scabies. I think things are gonna turn out just fine for those guys.

Various religious groups offered prayers Monday and spiritual leaders also planned to perform a tribal funeral rite, which involves butchering chickens and pigs to thank forest spirits for the fame and other blessings the crocodile has brought, Elordie said.

The crocodile’s capture in September 2011 sparked celebrations in the town. It was caught with steel cable traps during a hunt prompted by the death of a child in 2009 and the later disappearance of a fisherman. Water buffalos have also been attacked by crocodiles in the area.

Yup, it straight up ate babies and the whole town is mourning just the same. They’re even offering pork as a thank you, and someone probably had to mortgage their bamboo hut to swing that. Meanwhile you probably can’t even get your neighbor to water your plants while you’re out of town. I dunno, maybe if you contributed to your community a little more you could someday enjoy the kind of admiration that a freaky, murderous reptile commanded. It’s too bad we’ve got ten more months until it’s time to make New Year’s Resolutions, because that’d probably be a good one for you.

Source: ABC

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