This Day in Death

2.18.13: Lakers’ Owner Jerry Buss – DEAD!

Filed under: Dead —James @ 8:10 am February 21, 2013

JERRY_BUSSPictured: Cocaine.

 

As I’ve tried to make clear to you guys on numerous occasions, I don’t do a lot of sports posts around here. Sorry, but if I wanted to watch a bunch of guys in matching uniforms march around in front of mindlessly adoring crowds I can Netflix Schindler’s List. But maybe that’s your thing; Sports/Nazism. Hey, I’m not here to judge. My function is merely to unfairly frame things so that others may more easily judge in the future. It’s noble, sure, but I wouldn’t exactly call myself a ‘hero,’ per se.

Anyway, if you really insist on talking about someone other than me, here’s a little something about Lakers’ owner Jerry Buss dying. Hey, did you know that Jay-Z owns barely a tenth of a percent of the Nets, even though he acts like he’s purchased the entire borough of Brooklyn? Basically, if Jay-Z’s money wasn’t involved with the Nets then Andray Blatche might have to switch to a slightly less absorbent sweatband.

The death of the Lakers’ owner Jerry Buss Monday at age 80 brought out all the usual remembrances, which included the proper credit for creating the Lakers phenomenon out of almost nothing, for spawning much of what we recognize as the modern N.B.A. out of so much magic dust. The tales of the man behind all that, though, were so colorful and so unlikely, it is worth taking a second to realize that if Jerry Buss had not been real, Hollywood would have had to make him up.

Look, you can dress it up all you want, but I still think it’s silly that they based an entire sport off of a Will Ferrell movie. If that’s gonna be the template I’d much rather they make a phoney sport out of that one he did about the rednecks who drive around in circles for no good reason and wear jumpsuits with corporate logos all over them like a bunch of shameless goddamn whores. Man, that shit would be hilarious to watch in real life!

 

Source: The New York Times

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