This Day in Death

3.5.14: Game Show Host Geoff Edwards – DEAD!

Filed under: Dead —James @ 10:42 pm April 11, 2014

GEOFF_EDWARDS“Hey, you guys saw Seven, right? Oh. Well, you probably don’t wanna look in 29, then.”

 

According to a sentence I need to start this paragraph, being on a game show is a lot like life: There’s way too much standing around, just about all the detail you’d ever want to know about the person next to you can be summed up with three fun facts, and how much skill a person has at it is directly proportional to how skeptical and/or spiteful we are towards them. Also, sometimes there are a bunch of marines there for some reason.

That completely legitimate analogy brings us to the news that Geoff Edwards, best know as the host of the game shows Jackpot! and Treasure Hunt, has died. On a positive note, if we play this just right, it might mean we’re gonna walk out of this post with a Wink Martindale blurb in our pocket. NO WHAMMY, BLOCK QUOTE!

“Geoff was one of the cleverest, funniest radio and television personalities I’ve worked with,” said fellow game show host Wink Martindale. The two were DJs at pop radio station KMPC in Los Angeles.

Oh yeah, there it is. Seriously, if you don’t care what a guy named Wink has to say, then you and I are traveling on two roads that are simply never gonna intersect. We get a real-life Guy Smiley in here and you people don’t even know how to appreciate it. That’s why Drew Carey ended up hosting Price, you know.

 

 

Source: ABC News

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6.3.12: Family Feud Host Richard Dawson – DEAD!

Filed under: Dead —James @ 10:08 am June 4, 2012

This is what happens when the 100 random people you survey all happen to be me.

 

If you’re having trouble mentally placing Richard Dawson in the pantheon of Family Feud hosts, he was the one that wasn’t fat, black, from Seinfeld, crazy, or Al Borland. Which just leaves creepy: Dawson’s deal was making out with every female contestant, which is all you’re going to see written about him since it’s the only thing anyone remembers about this stupid show. Goddammit, Family Feud was never supposed to be about sex. Louie Anderson proved that. It was supposed to be about the subtle feeling of shame when you realize you’re kinda hoping that the white family wins. Come on, let’s just admit it already. Everybody already knows we do that shit all the time anyway.

Dawson died Saturday at Ronald Reagan UCLA Medical Center from complications related to esophageal cancer. The actor, who had been living in Beverly Hills, was diagnosed with the disease about three weeks ago, said his son Gary.

“The way he was on the game show was the way he was in real life,” Gary Dawson said Sunday. “He was always rooting for people — he not only wanted people to win, but to have a comfortable, great experience.”

“And tits. He wanted them to have tits as well,” he probably continued.

Also, I realize that I haven’t shown a picture of Dawson yet, but I’m not going to because I’d much rather post literally any picture ever taken of Steve Harvey. Watch this:

Seriously. Try to tell me you wouldn’t want this put into a syringe and injected between your toes every morning and I will kindly request you take the necessary steps towards fucking yourself, sir or madam. I don’t know exactly how you’re going to make that happen, but it’s really your problem now, not mine.

 



Source: Times Herald Record

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5.4.12: Game Show Producer Bob Stewart – DEAD!

Filed under: Dead —James @ 9:54 am May 11, 2012

“To Tell the Truth, this smells like Mark Goodson’s wife! Haha! I have serious sociological issues!”

 

Television game show producer Bob Stewart, the man behind To Tell the Truth, Password (the boring, SFW version) and The Price is Right has died at the age of 91. He actually died last Friday, so I probably should’ve reported on this earlier, but there’s been a glut of deaths over the last week. Putting any more effort into this blog would have been dangerously similar to having a real job, and if I wanted that I never would’ve slashed the tires of my shift manager at Quizno’s. I’M NOT WEARING A HAIRNET, DEBRA! IT’S HOW I EXPRESS MYSELF!

In 1964, Stewart started his own production entity and during the next 28 years created and produced 15 network series, highlighted by the Pyramid franchise. Hosted by Dick Clark, The $10,000Pyramid and its various bigger-money incarnations collected nine Emmys for best game show.

A native of Brooklyn who entered the Television Academy Hall of Fame in 2009, Stewart landed his first show business job after World War II as a writer for WNEW-AM New York. He entered television in the early 1950s, writing, producing and directing for several New York broadcasters.

Stewart’s big career break came during a 1956 meeting with Goodson, during which he pitched the concepts for Price Is Right and To Tell the Truth. He created Password five years later.

Good times, good times. The 50s were truly the golden age of crooked game shows. How the hell are today’s coked-up producers supposed to rig concepts like  ‘Howie Mandel lets high school dropouts arbitrarily choose suitcases from random skanks’? That shit is chaos theory. Wait, is that show still on the air? I don’t think it is. That’s sad, all those people out of work. It’s always the skanks that suffer.

 

Source: The Hollywood Reporter

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4.30.12: Crazy Texas Poker Guy Thomas ‘Amarillo Slim’ Preston – DEAD!

Filed under: Dead —James @ 9:30 am May 1, 2012

Probably.


Before it mutated into an elaborate hoax to get Jennifer Tilly’s cleavage on television more often, poker was considered a game. A game for cool, sophisticated guys in polo shirts and green visors who quote “The Cincinnati Kid” to you hoping you’ll think they actually made those lines up themselves. Whether you knew it or not, Thomas ‘Amarillo Slim’ Preston was the man responsible for bringing that subtle melange of class and borderline insane redneckery to the game. Or maybe not, I dunno. To be honest I really don’t know a lot about poker. Personally I prefer games that require me to remember which previously flipped card had a cartoon elephant on it. It sounds easy, but it’s really not. The best games are like that.

Thomas Austin “Amarillo Slim” Preston Jr., a poker champion whose brash style, fast talking and love of the spotlight helped broaden the professional game’s appeal and made him one of its most recognizable characters, has died. He was 83.

Preston’s son, Bunky Preston, said he died Sunday of colon cancer while in hospice care in Amarillo, where he lived.

He got his “Amarillo Slim” nickname playing pool, according to Preston’s son, and with his cowboy hat and southern drawl, he wouldn’t have been out of place gambling in an Old West saloon.

Preston would bet on just about anything, and he mastered the art of stretching the truth. Among his many claims laid out on his website are that he played Minnesota Fats in one-pocket billiards using a broomstick; beat Bobby Riggs, of Billie Jean King fame, at ping pong using an iron skillet; and outran “a horse for a hundred yards (no one ever said nothing about the race being straight-away).”

This guy seemed delightfully unhinged. I have nothing negative to say about him, so let’s just wrap up this post and get on with our lives. That is, assuming there isn’t more to the article, especially something that would drop an uncomfortable pallor over his life. But what are the odds of that?

Preston’s later life brought charges that he molested…

Oh shit. No good sentence ever begins like that.

…a young relative.

GodDAMMIT.

Records show a 2004 conviction on three misdemeanor charges of assault causing bodily injury in Amarillo in a case involving the 12-year-old girl. Preston, 75 at the time, was sentenced to two years’ probation with deferred adjudication and fined $4,000.

The plea came after a Randall County grand jury indicted Preston on three counts of indecency of a child by sexual contact, a second-degree felony.

Preston’s attorney at the time was quoted in an AP story as saying prosecutors were willing to drop the felony charges because they couldn’t prove their case.

Preston later told an interviewer for a poker website that the incidents stemmed from a misunderstanding when his grandchildren were with him in the cab of his pickup truck and at a swimming pool.

Ugh. See, this is why I need to hire a weekend guy. I really don’t feel like handling this one anymore. If you live in Texas, own a pickup truck and/or a swimming pool, and have ever done anything in them with a 12-year-old, there WILL be “misunderstandings.” Especially if the name of the game you’re famous for playing is a common innuendo for casual sexual penetration. It’s in the state constitution, for fuck’s sake.

He said he pleaded guilty to protect his family from embarrassment.

“It would have been very easy for me (to win),” he said. “But I didn’t want my family dragged through a trial and being made my enemy in the court. I didn’t want my 12-year-old granddaughter to have to take the stand.”

And there’s the one situation where having it legally declared that you were molested by your grandfather is the *less* humiliating option. I do however like that he still managed to turn it into a competition by insisting that he could’ve won the case easily. You got this one, Slim!

 

Source: Sports Illustrated

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2.19.12: Steve Kordek (Pinball Innovator) – DEAD!

Filed under: Dead —James @ 7:15 pm February 28, 2012

If the pinball thing hadn’t worked out he definitely could’ve fallen back on his degree in wearing awesome windbreakers.

 

Pinball innovator Steve Kordek died last week at the age of 100. Kordek created the dual flipper design for the game, effectively defining the modern pinball machine as we know it today. Or, more precisely, as 1950s greasers who needed to kill time before impregnating both of the Pickerelli Twins in the alley behind the malt shop knew it. That is a lifestyle that is in dire need of a comeback.

Mr Kordek’s mark in history as the man who revolutionised the classic arcade game almost did not happen – he was walking in Chicago in 1937 when he was caught in a rainstorm without an umbrella, forcing him into the nearest lobby for shelter.

The lobby was that of Genco, which was for a prominent pinball factory. Mr Kordek unexpectedly walked out with a job, earning 45 cents an hour soldering on the production line.

That’s right: In 1937 you could walk into literally any building and leave with a job. It was a magical time of great prosperity for all! Your great grandpa is such a fucking liar, man.

Source: MailOnline

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