This Day in Death

2.22.13: Songwriter Diane Lampert – DEAD!

Filed under: Dead —James @ 9:55 am February 26, 2013

DIANE_LAMPERTLampert and Buster Keaton having a flat hat-off.

 

Everyone knows that writing your own song is for chumps. That shit is hard, and writing is super time-consuming. Hell, this post has taken me four hours so far and it doesn’t even rhyme. Besides, Paula Cole already wrote Where Have All the Cowboys Gone, so you’re looking at taking the silver in that game, tops. If you’re a successful musician it’s best to just let someone else take care of the songwriting so you can get back to doing bumps off the backs of your army of Thai ladyboys.

Unfortunately, songwriter Diane Charlotte Lampert is dead, meaning you’re one step closer to being forced to write your own damn music. Or you could just steal Walk the Dinosaur, nobody remembers that song anyway. Alternately you could go the Maroon 5 route and just steal lyrics from the diaries of 12-year old girls. Believe me, they can’t fight back for shit.

Diane Charlotte Lampert, an accomplished songwriter of the 1950s and 1960s who wrote lyrics to title songs for more than 20 movies, has died.

Lampert’s husband, Fred Stuart, said she died of heart failure Friday at a Manhattan hospital. She was 88.

Lampert worked on songs performed by Brenda Lee, Steve Lawrence, Red Foley, The Lettermen and others.

Of course, Spinner leads with a picture of The Beatles and their headline claims that Lampert wrote songs FOR them, despite the fact that she only co-wrote one song that The Beatles just happened to perform, years after Eddie Fontane had already released his version of it. Several other acts would record the song in the following decades, and The Beatles’ version would remain unheard until it was finally released on a live album in 1994, which is apparently a tenuous enough connection to frame a piece of writing around if you just squeeze hard enough. It’s a disingenuous trick that anyone who’s bought my novella, That Time I Think I Saw One of the Guys From U2 (Definitely Not Bono or the Edge, One of the Other Ones) at the Orange Julius, But I Can’t Be Sure Because I was Kind of in a Hurry and Didn’t Really Stop to Look, knows all too well. Seriously, he’s only in it for, like, half a page! You guys are suckers, man.

 

Source: Spinner

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