This Day in Death

1.30.13: Patty Andrews of The Andrews Sisters – DEAD!

Filed under: Dead —James @ 9:47 pm January 31, 2013

PATTY_ANDREWSUh, ladies? Are those Kelvin knots on those ties? Either respect the uniform with the proper double Windsor or go back to Germany. Fascists.

Patty Andrews, lead singer of old-timey group The Andrews Sister is dead today and Jesus Christ, you know what? There’s only so many times that I can write this same intro. Look, a lady your grandparents vaguely remember hearing sing decades ago in-between flagpole sitting lessons and coming up with more subtle racial epithets for black people is dead. She got old, she died. Not satisfied? Well, if all you’re giving me to work with are flat stones don’t be surprised when I can’t reinvent the wheel for you.

With their jazzy renditions of songs like “Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy (of Company B),” “Rum and Coca-Cola” and “Don’t Sit Under the Apple Tree (With Anyone Else but Me),” Patty, Maxene and LaVerne Andrews sold war bonds, boosted morale on the home front, performed with Bing Crosby and with the Glenn Miller Orchestra, made movies and entertained thousands of American troops overseas, for whom the women represented the loves and the land the troops had left behind.

Am I the only one who finds it a little dickish to entertain troops by reminding them of the awesome luxuries that they themselves don’t get to have? Every single day of my life is filled with the most insane conveniences and entertainment the world can offer while they’re stuck guarding crates in a country I probably couldn’t even locate on a map of that same country. If we really cared about their morale we’d lie about how great it is over here. Just tell them that that “Gangnam Style” thing is still popular while talking in a sleepy voice and pretending to yawn. “Nah, you guys really aren’t missing out on much. It’s been kinda lame since you left, actually. Yeah, I think we’re just gonna hit the hay early tonight.”


Source: The New York Times

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